"A true Gentleman is one who never offends by mistake"
-Oscar Wilde
Those who know me know that I do my utmost best to remain on the good side of everyone I meet. Firstly i don't believe in going around, being a jerk just for the sake of being a jerk. That requires a lot of time and energy, and you never know when someone you've casually insulted is going to be in a position to royally eff with your day. Second, I don't enjoy conflict. And third, i tend to be very forgiving of people's personality quirks. People generally are the way they are, and it doesn't do anyone much good to go around pointing out how much others suck, least of all me.
But occasions do arise when someone needs to be knocked down a peg or two and the only proper course of action is to let someone know exactly where they stand in the universe's grand scheme of things. There is an art to this (an art i have by no means mastered) but to my thinking a good insult should be witty, timely and true. If you find yourself in such a situation i hope you find the material included below to be of some assistance.
(via Laughing Squid)
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